Success...It's All in the Letter P By now we are familiar with Nigel Lythgoe, the British television director and producer, who created such smash hits as Ameri...

Second is the New First...What You Win by Losing

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Original Publication Date:
September 2010

Coming into the 18th at Whistling Straits, Dustin Johnson had a one-shot lead on this final hole in the competition. All he had to do was sink a 7-ft putt and he'd have won his first major—a major accomplishment in the world of golf. He missed. That means, instead, he bogeyed the hole giving him a score of 5. As is customary, he pulled out his scorecard and penciled in the number. Finishing out his round with a 71 put him in a 3-way tie with two other players. Both guys had already completed their rounds and were sitting in the clubhouse awaiting the results. Now, all three of them would go back out on the course in a 3-hole playoff to see who would take the PGA Championship. A lot was riding on the win. But wait just a minute, not so fast. Just as he was turning in his card an official interceded. It seems he had committed an infraction on the 18th hole (a ground the club in an "unrecognizable" beyond-the ropes bunker infraction) that would cost him a two-stoke penalty, thus bringing his score in at 73, not 71. This penalty knocked him out of the playoff and his chances of winning vanished.

Coming into the final week of the competition Kent Boyd was on a runaway train and heralded the one to beat. None of the other dancers stood a chance of overtaking this charismatic lad. Since early on in the show the judges had raved about his growth and personality, and the small town, farm kid from Wapakoneta had screaming fans losing their minds, showering him with rock star treatment. Time and again, he was told he was a contender, the one anointed to take it all. True or not, fair or not, he felt he had a shot, a real shot, at the title. A lot was riding on the win. But wait just a minute, not so fast. Just as he rounded the final bend and danced the final dances in the all-important finale, everything seemed to change.

Coming into the campaign Hillary Clinton was the clear favorite and good odds in Vegas to secure her spot on the ticket for President. Many would have called it a sure bet and once she rolled through this process she'd be on a roll over McCain right into The White House. It was hers for the taking, and she felt she had a date with destiny and a calling to make history. A lot was riding on the win. But wait just a minute. Not so fast. Don't pull out the inauguration oath yet. With the well-oiled Clinton machine making some uncharacteristic strategic blunders and gross underestimations, the campaign went south and she came out on the other side a woman without a nomination.

Dustin Johnson, Kent Boyd, and Hillary Clinton have one thing in common. Just when you thought they were about to win, they didn't. They lost. In all three cases it was a pretty crushing blow. The golfer, the dancer, and the politician fell short of their goal of coming in first and had to settle for a place behind the winner. In Dustin's case—with the assessed penalty—he ended up finishing tied for fifth, but it could have easily been second. In Kent's case he finished second behind Lauren Froderman. In Hillary's case she finished second behind, then, Senator Barack Obama. Losing isn't fun. It isn't popular. It isn't normally easy to handle. But are we selling it short? We all know how to act when we win. We're pretty good at popping champagne and cheering and smiling and hugging and fumbling around making that acceptance speech or holding up that trophy or prize. Winning is a piece of cake. Standing there hearing someone else's name called other than yours is another matter. Most people don't do a good job of losing. Some take it so hard they never recover. Then there are those who handle it as if they had won even though they hadn't. That's because they are winners at heart. They know they might not have achieved the highest award or honor on this given day, but they'll find a way to turn this experience into a winning experience. They'll actually make coming in second seem as good as coming in first.

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